I have had some difficult days in the past few years; days when, like the Psalmist, I wondered where God was, and why He had left me.
I get angry with myself during those times. At this stage of my walk with Him, this should not happen any more, should it?
But then I remember standing by my father’s bed in CCU, in a quiet broken only by low murmurs from the nurses’ station, and the beeps, wheezes, and dings of the machinery keeping him alive. All the tubes and hoses fastened to him were almost more than I could bear to look at, and I usually found myself watching the vitals monitor. You know what I wanted to see then? Up and down. Up and down. Up and down. The last thing in the world I wanted to see was a flat line.
You see, the question isn’t, do you have some down days? The question is, do you come back up? A flat-liner is dead. Ups and downs mean you are dealing with the vagaries of life, some days better than others. They do not mean you have no faith; they just mean you are still alive! Certainly we shouldn’t experience the wild ups and downs of a rollercoaster ride, but the gentle waves of a rising tide is perfectly natural, waves that lap the shore steadily, reaching further and further inland so that today’s lows are higher than yesterday’s highs.
So when you find yourself in the valley, don’t give in. Hang on and pull yourself back up. That’s what matters. Besides, you are not the only one pulling. If you were, you would never make it back up.
As for me, I said in my haste,
I am cut off from before your eyes.
Nevertheless, you heard the voice of my supplications
When I cried unto you.
Oh love Jehovah, all you saints;
Jehovah preserves the faithful
But plentifully pays back the proud.
Be strong and let your heart take courage.
All you who hope in Jehovah.