Now pay attention!  “Irregardless” is not a word; the word is “regardless.”  “Preventative” and “attentative” are not words; the words are “preventive” and “attentive” without the extra “ta” syllable.  You go to an “orientation” session to become “oriented,” not “orientated.” 
            You are not “laying” in bed.  If you were, there would be a pile of eggs there.  Today you “lie” there, yesterday you “lay” there, and in the past you “have lain” there.  However, if you are talking about something you put in the bed, then today you “lay” it there, yesterday you “laid” it there, and in the past you also “have laid” it there. 
            The words are not pronounced “comPARable” and “irrePARable,” they are pronounced “COMparable” and “irREParable.”  And at least until recently when the lexicographers finally gave up and put it in as an allowed pronunciation, the word was correctly pronounced “off-en” without the T, rather than “off-ten” with the T.  At least know that the pronunciation of the word “often” has been corrupted, please. 
            “Hopefully the weather will clear up” is an impossibility.  The weather cannot do anything hopefully, and that is the word being modified in that sentence.  What you mean to say is, “I hope the weather will clear up.”  “Hopefully” used at the beginning of a sentence is almost always wrong.
            You cannot “bring” something to a place you are not at; you TAKE it there.  When you feel ill, you feel “nauseated.”  When you are “nauseous,” you are causing nausea in others, although my dictionary tells me that it has been used wrong for so long that they have created a second definition for it.
            You know what is so aggravating about all of this?  I am not a grammarian.  I did not have a grammar class after ninth grade.  The English classes after that were all literature and writing.  Any real grammar scholar could find fault with me.  I was, in fact, re-reading an old devotional the other day and found a split infinitive in it.  I am just an ordinarily educated person when it comes to grammar.  So if I know all these things, what in the world happened?  I see and hear them in what purports to be professional speech and writing all the time.  It’s one thing for us common folks to be less than careful about how we speak, but shouldn’t the pros have standards?
            Before you start on me for being too picky and fussy, let me remind you that I am in good company.  Paul and Jesus both made arguments based on word choice and grammar.
            In Galatians 3:16 Paul uses the number of the noun “seed” to prove that Jesus was the fulfillment to the promise to Abraham.  Now to Abraham were the promises spoken, and to his seed.  He said not, and to seeds, as of many, but as of one, and to thy seed, which is Christ.  In the first major controversy in the new kingdom, when Jewish Christians were attempting to force Judaism on Gentile Christians as necessary to salvation, that was important.  Pretty picky of Paul, wasn’t it?
            Jesus proved to the Sadducees the resurrection of the dead when he quoted God as He spoke to Moses on Mt Sinai from the burning bush, I am the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.  At that point, those men had been long dead, yet God spoke of them in the present tense.  Jesus said, But as regarding the resurrection of the dead, haven’t you read that which was spoken to you by God, I am the God of Abraham and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob?  God is not the God of the dead, but of the living, Matt 22:31,32, an argument based solely on the tense of a verb.  Good thing it had nothing to do with “laying!”
            We have a tendency to think of those people in “Bible times” as primitive, ignorant folks.  Jesus made a claim of Divinity to them using two words, which of necessity were in the present tense.  Before Abraham was, I AM, John 8:58.  Did they catch something so fussy and nitpicky?  I think so.  They took up stones therefore to cast at him.  I wonder if today’s generation would have just shrugged their shoulders and walked on.
            It is permissible to be picky with the Scriptures.  We are in good company when we are.  Be careful however, that your pickiness is not about pettiness.  “Picky” and “petty” are not the same.  Jesus and the apostles were one, but not the other.  Study the difference, study your scriptures.  God did choose words to communicate with us, not subjective feelings.  Aren’t we glad?  There can be no mistake if you have it down in black and white.
           
Truly I say to you, till heaven and earth pass away, one jot or one tittle shall in no way pass from the law till all things are accomplished.  Whoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments and shall teach men so, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven.  But whoever shall do and teach them, he shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven, Matt 5:18,19.
 
Dene Ward

Sometimes the craziness people come up with, both scholar and layman, amazes me.  Yes, the Bible is the inerrant Word of God and must be followed to the letter, or why bother at all?  But God did spend over a millennium trying to communicate with us in our language, exactly the way we use language, so that we could understand exactly what that Word means and follow it.  And guess how we communicate?  We use idioms.  We use hyperboles.  We use all sorts of figurative language every day.  Yet still people think that every single word in the Bible is meant to be taken literally and ignore obvious figures to the point that entire convoluted false doctrines can come from it.
            Here is a simple example:  And there was one Anna, a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher (she was of a great age, having lived with a husband seven years from her virginity, and she had been a widow even unto fourscore and four years), who departed not from the temple, worshipping with fastings and supplications night and day (Luke 2:36-37).
            We could spend a lot of time on those two verses alone.  We could talk about the family Anna came from, and their obvious devotion to God, a devotion that sometime in the distant past caused them leave their property in the northern kingdom and travel south at probably great loss.  We could talk about the difficulty translating her age and marriage so that we really are not sure if she was 84 or whether it had been 84 years since she became a widow—not really as far-fetched as you might imagine if you do some research.  But let's just concentrate on the last couple of phrases:  who departed not from the temple, worshipping with fastings and supplications night and day. 
            Many would have her living at the Temple and doing nothing else in her life.  But look at the things she did "night and day."  I don't have to be a Greek scholar to know this:  if "night and day" means 24/7, she would not have lasted more than a few days because one of the things she did "night and day" was fast.  What applies to fasting applies to the rest.  She simply made a habit of fasting.  Not every single day all day long.  What does an exasperated mother mean when she says of her teenage son, "All he does is play video games?"  See?  We use the same sort of language all the time.  (See what I just did?)
            So this good woman made a habit of going to the Temple, of worshipping God with fasting and prayer.  We can do the same thing, except our temple is the body of Christ, the church.  Are you following Anna's example so well that someone would say of you, "She worships God all the time?"  That's what we should learn from Anna, if we learn nothing else at all.
 
One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple (Ps 27:4).
 
Dene Ward

A long time ago when I was a young mother, a wise, older woman made me stop and think with a few words that might have sounded harsh, but which she couched with an attitude of love and concern.  I had not taken a meal to a sick or grieving family for a long time; I had not taught a children’s class for about a year; I had not had anyone in my home for several months; I hadn’t even sent a card or made a phone call for awhile.  I was a busy young mother.  I had laundry to do every day including piles of diapers that never seemed to diminish, meals to fix, a baby to nurse and tend and a toddler to care for and teach, and a home that needed putting in some sort of order if just so we could keep track of where we put things, like the bills that needed paying. 
            Had this woman had the same problems years before when she was a young mother?  I suppose so, but I never even thought about that—all I thought about was my own problems, all the things I needed to do, how tired I was, and how I could not possibly do any of those other things because of the demands of my family and home. 
            She knew all this, but she still asked this simple question.  “What if,” she quietly said, “God decided to help you out by taking away all of your excuses?”
            After a moment of shock, I suddenly saw my children and my home in another light.  Here I was claiming to love them more than anything else, while telling everyone what an obstacle they were in my life, maybe not in words, but certainly in deeds—or lack of them.  Yes, serving my family is also serving God, but isn’t it hypocritical to then turn around and use that service as a reason not to serve others?  The last thing in the world I wanted was for God to take them away from me, and I determined that they would no longer be the excuses I offered for not doing what I could. 
            No, I could not spend hours and hours away from them, nor several hours caring for others directly, but surely I could pick up the phone or write a note when the babies were napping.  Surely I could fix an extra casserole when I made one for my family, and send it with someone else to a home where a mother was too sick to do it and the father was out working all day.  Surely, I could find something I could do.
            I think something else happened to my attitude that day, too.  I was suddenly aware of all the things that needed doing for others, and looking forward to a time when I could, instead of sitting at home, selfishly wondering when I would ever have “me time” again.  My home was where I wanted to be, but I also knew that I wanted to be doing what I could for others, when I could, for as long as I could, just like that kind sister who taught me a lesson with a simple question. 
            What kind of excuses have already come out of our mouths today?  What if God took them away in the blink of an eye so we could do those things we claim to want to do “if only…?”
 
But he said unto him, A certain man made a great supper; and he bade many: and he sent forth his servant at supper time to say to them that were bidden, Come; for things are now ready. And they all with one consent began to make excuse. The first said unto him, I have bought a field, and I must needs go out and see it; I pray have me excused.  And another said, I have bought five yoke of oxen, and I go to prove them; I pray have me excused. And another said, I have married a wife, and therefore I cannot come. And the servant came, and told his lord these things. Then the master of the house being angry said to his servant, Go out quickly into the streets and lanes of the city, and bring in the poor and maimed and blind and lame... For I say unto you, that none of those men that were bidden shall taste of my supper. Luke 14:16-21,24.
 
Dene Ward

This is one of those announcements that is difficult to make without it sounding like something it is not.  It is not meant to be an advertisement or solicitation of any sort, and certainly not a plea for sympathy.  I hope you will understand as I explain.
            If you know me personally, or have simply read the About Dene page on the Flight Paths blog, you know that I have vision issues.  God has been gracious to me, allowing a very long reprieve as these issues have progressed.  As always, my prayers have been, "Thy will be done," so if He chooses to end this reprieve I can only thank Him for the extra time He has given me to teach and write, when I have been told that I should not have been able to see past the age of twenty, and, "This usually lasts 3 to 5 years" fifteen years ago. Things are beginning to change.  I am praying that these "things" are inconsequential as they have been for so long, but when your doctor says, "You are no longer stable—you are worsening," they might have more meaning than one would wish.
            That means I have new motivation to teach and write.  I am now working harder on a new lesson series after having several ask me to have it printed.  The Teacher's Manual is in progress and I am hoping for everything to be ready to go to print next summer.  And now that Covid is also slowing down and things are getting back to normal, I actually have speaking engagements on my calendar.  As to that…
            If you have ever considered it, let me encourage you, due to my doctor's warning, to stop putting it off.  Nothing thrills me more than to meet the people who read my blog and others who just love to learn about the Word of God.  There are so many hungering for deeper study and meditation.  But let me quickly talk about some of the questions you may have.
            It doesn't matter how many.  I have spoken to as few as 9 or 10 or as many as 300 women.
            It doesn't matter where we do it.  I have spoken in college auditoriums and in church auditoriums.  I have spoken in lodges and in Bible class rooms.  I have spoken in hotel ballrooms and even in a rented monastery.  One of the church "auditoriums" I spoke in was actually the family room of a house the church was then meeting in.  I will emulate Lydia and meet by the river if we need to.
            It needn't be elaborate.  Sometimes it is an overnight affair in a hotel.  Sometimes it is a morning of two or three sessions followed by a potluck put on by the class members.  Sometimes we all go out to a local restaurant afterward and enjoy a Dutch treat lunch together.  More than once I have shaken everyone's hand as they left and that was that.  See?  Anything goes with these things.  As long as I get to teach I am happy.
            You do not have to scour the landscape looking for other speakers.  Several times I have done the whole day all by myself, as many as three sessions with 10 minute breaks in between.  And I now have a daughter-in-law, a professor, who has begun doing these things as well.  We laughed and said we could do a whole day together and bill ourselves as "Ward Women for the Word!"
            Timing is not that much of an issue.  One time I taught all Saturday morning in one place, then got in the car and taught all Sunday afternoon 200 miles south of there.  I am very flexible and we can work things out.
            You do not have to come up with elaborate themes unless you want to.  I can certainly do a requested topic, but I also have twenty+ years' worth of speeches I can sift through and give you choices from.  Or you can just trust me to know what is needed everywhere, because believe me, people are all the same—except maybe whether or not they like sweet tea or grits.
            And it doesn't matter if I have been there before.  I have been to several areas more than once.
            If you have other questions, please put them in the comments section.  I am sure someone else has the same questions.  And remember, I have no idea how much time I may have.  My eyes are already "living on borrowed time," and I want to help as many as possible before it is too late.  And let's make this the lesson for the day—none of us knows what changes tomorrow may bring to our lives, and none of us knows how much time we have left.  Act today as if you knew there would be no tomorrow, because there might not be.
            Thank you all for your support and the kind messages and comments you often send.  Meanwhile I am praying harder for this notice to have been totally unnecessary.  On the other hand, if I get to meet more of you wonderful sisters sooner, well, maybe it was worth writing.
 
I think it right, as long as I am in this body, to stir you up by way of reminder, since I know that the putting off of my [eyes may] be soon… (2Pet 1:13-14).
 
Dene Ward

"Why do you have to know that stuff anyway?"
            This one I heard after we had studied the Minor Prophets on Wednesday evenings several years ago.  Why should we be studying all these old stuffy hellfire and brimstone preachers when they aren't even talking about us anyway?
            Aren't they?  The biggest mistake we can make is to assume that things in the Bible do not apply to us.  Why in the world do we think God saved them for us?  For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope (Rom 15:4).  By studying how God dealt with those people we can learn the character and nature of God.  We can learn what pleases and displeases him.  Sadly, we can learn that we aren't really any different from those people and our nation is going the way of that one.  That makes those passages a warning we need to heed if we hope to survive where they did not.
            But sometimes I hear from young women teaching my own Bible study material in other places that they not only hear that question, they also have people actually becoming upset because things are being taught that they never heard before, and that their old view of a specific Bible event was inaccurate.  Never mind that these "new things" are solidly supported by scripture or other documentation.  If they didn't know it or never heard it, it can't be true or if it is, it can't be important.  That is exactly what our friends and neighbors do when we try to teach them the truth of the Bible.  Any excuse is good enough if it gets us off the hook.
            But why would anyone want to find an excuse not to learn something new?  Yes, it changes a lot of preconceived notions and wrong pictures we have in our heads about Biblical narratives when we do a little study of culture, when we carefully read and reread the scripture and actually find things we have missed all these years.  And that means we have probably been teaching our children wrong things, too.  Check those Bible story pictures we put out for them to color.  A lot of them are just plain wrong!  Don't we want to teach our children correctly?  We had better because God will hold us accountable for what we teach.  Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness (Jas 3:1).
            "But it's such a little thing," I often hear about some of the things that I point out.  Well, it may be, but what about the next thing and the next?  As one of my newer students said in class one day, "You keep getting the little things wrong and soon the whole thing is wrong."  As another one put it, "Knowing things like ages [that take time and math to figure out] can help you understand motivations better.  Suddenly it makes sense that Rebekah would follow her husband's instructions about pretending to be his sister when you know he was old enough to be her father and she was very young."  It might not make it right, but you can see how it would happen much more easily.
            And really, how can anyone ever say about the Word of God, "Why do we have to know that stuff anyway?"  Doesn't that display an attitude we should abhor?  There may be deeper things that we can learn over time because they do not affect the "now" urgency of salvation, but that doesn't mean we ignore them forever.  It should mean we are more eager to get to them than ever before.
 
Give instruction to a wise person, and he will become wiser still; ​​​​​​teach a righteous person and he will add to his learning. Prov 9:9
 
Dene Ward

A few weeks ago I took a few minutes to show my class how to figure out Jacob's age when he left home for Haran.  It took putting together a lot of different verses and you had to start with his age when he went to Egypt and back up, but it only required simple math, in this case subtraction.  I had already shown them how to show that neither Shem nor Abram were the eldest brothers, more simple math, both adding and subtracting.  We have also discussed the cultural norms for weaning and for young girls' "marriageable age," along with how much wood a young man can carry at what age.  When we came up with Jacob's age when he made that original deal for Rachel, they were shocked at the number.  So what was it?  Well, about that…
            Some folks wonder, what's the big deal?  Why figure this out in the first place?  I'll tell you one quick reason—it completely undoes a lot of false pictures we have in our minds when we try to visualize these Bible narratives.  For another, it can explain what we originally considered inexplicable behavior when we realize how old someone was—or wasn't.  You might just want to throw away a lot of those coloring sheets you have used for your Bible classes and maybe create a few of your own.
            But the larger lesson for today is this.  Just who figured all this out in the first place?  Who took the time to find passage after passage, research history, geography, and other assorted minutiae, and then carefully put it all together?  Some of it came from scholars whose work was to do just that.  But some has come from ordinary people like you and me who simply spend time in the Word, many of whom did so a couple of centuries ago.
            They took care of their day to day existence, which meant tilling, planting, and growing everything they ate, preserving the things they would eat during the winter, weaving the cloth to make every item they wore, and carrying water for everything from drinking and cooking, to cleaning and bathing, to watering their considerable livestock, which they also fed and cared for as required, by the way.  And they did everything without power equipment or time saving devices.  Then they came in worn out at night and by candle or lamplight opened God's Word.  They spent so much time in the Word that they could write hymns not based upon one passage, but with each line quoting or alluding to a different passage.  Any time something happened in their lives they could quote a scripture that applied.  They spent all their "spare" time in that, rather than watching TV, scrolling through Facebook or otherwise surfing the internet, or texting, talking, or simply staring rapt at their phones.  That's how those people "had more time than we do."  Nonsense.
            Some still might think those pieces of information I mentioned above are trivial or even pointless.  Seems to me that if God made it possible to figure them out, then just maybe that is exactly what we ought to be doing.  As for Jacob's age when he bargained for Rachel, why don't you try that one yourself?  Things like that and knowing Jacob's age at the birth of Joseph (that one's easy) might not be essential to my salvation, but spending so much time in the Word of God that I can figure that out too, might just be.
 
Oh how I love your law! It is my meditation all the day. Your commandment makes me wiser than my enemies, for it is ever with me. I have more understanding than all my teachers, for your testimonies are my meditation (Ps 119:97-99).
 
Dene Ward

Yesterday, several of my sisters in the Lord met for an intense Bible study.  We were at it for well over an hour.  We opened our Bibles and read and discussed topics that were deep and heavy.  We came away with many new insights, some of them probably different than if it had been a mixed class or a class led by a man.  Women do have a different perspective.  The Tuesday before that we did the same thing, and the Tuesday before that, and the one before that, as far back as 25 years.  We call it the Ladies’ Bible Class, not because it is some organization separate from the church which has a name, but just to identify to others who might be interested what it is, a group of women, Christians with the same roles in life and the same problems those roles entail, who meet and study together. 
            But let’s just consider the past two months’ worth of classes—about 12 hours.  What if, instead of meeting 8 times for an hour and a half each, we met two days for 6 hours of study and discussion each day?  Would that be wrong?  If we are studying the same thing, participating in the same activities, why isn’t it just another means to edify?  And if, because we have a chance to study without children sitting in our laps (due to Christian husbands who are concerned for their wives’ spiritual education), we decide to have it someplace besides the meetinghouse, but we each pay our own way and nothing comes out of the church treasury, isn’t that too just another ladies Bible class?  That is exactly what a women’s retreat is—time to get away from the distractions of life for an extended period and do some in-depth Bible study and encourage one another.
            These groups are not making themselves into an organization of any kind at all.  They are simply doing what the word says—retreating.  Jesus “retreated” when he went to be alone and pray.  Isaac “retreated” when he went out into the field in the evening to meditate (Gen 24:63).  Did that make what they were doing an organization?  Even if they had taken a friend to discuss spiritual things with them, no organization existed, just a few people who were spiritually minded enough to set aside the time to study together or pray together.
            I have also read the accusation that any time women retreat for Bible study it shows a dissatisfaction with the edification the church can provide.  That the church is supposed to be where we find all our spiritual blessings, including prayer, teaching, and encouragement.  That women who do these things may have good intentions, but they are doing it in an unscriptural, unauthorized way, separate from the church where they should be finding all their needs met.
            The Bible tells us that some of the church in Jerusalem met in the home of Mary the mother of Mark to pray for Peter when he was in prison (Acts 12).  Was that wrong?  We can easily infer that it was not the whole church—no one’s house is big enough for that.  That means a group of Christians that was not the church met for something besides the regular worship, not because they didn’t pray enough at their assembly, but because they felt the need to pray even more.  Does that mean they were not satisfied with God’s arrangement?  Are we not allowed to come together for even more prayer than we have on Sundays?
            A few members of the church meeting somewhere besides the appointed meeting place for more study does not constitute setting up an organization.  If women’s retreats, or week-ends as they are sometimes called, are wrong, so are Ladies’ Bible Classes.  So are Men’s Training Classes.  So are gospel sings in people’s homes or out in the park or in an auditorium somewhere.  So are personal Bible studies.  But of course, none of those things are wrong.  God has ordained that the older women and men teach the younger women and men, that children be taught, the unbelievers be taught by all of us, not just the preacher.  In the early church they often met “house to house.”  Weren’t their needs being met in the assembly?  Of course they were, so this is obviously something other than an attempt to go beyond the purpose of the church.
            And then we have that group of men who met to show others exactly what God wanted them to do about Judaizers and their demand that Gentile Christians be circumcised (Acts 15).  They did that with a long meeting where they gave approved examples, read the scriptures, discussed and prayed.  It was not the church.  In fact, it was members of more than one church.  Some people call it a Council.  What people call it does not make it what it is not.  These men “retreated” from daily life for the sake of edification.
            “Women’s retreat” is not a name any more than “church of Christ” is a name.  Both are descriptions.  Maybe some of us need a little more edification about that. 
            Some of us have become so wedded to our traditions that we have forgotten what is and is not tradition, “teaching for doctrine the commandments of men.”  Fulfilling generic commands to teach and edify with “new” methods does not make them automatically wrong or you had better take that power point away from your preacher. 
             And just what makes this retreat thing “new” anyway?  Aside from all the Bible examples already given, Lydia met with a group of women down by the river.  I think we are in good company.
 
Having received this order, he put them into the inner prison and fastened their feet in the stocks. About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them, Acts 16:24-25.
 
Dene Ward

I finally did it a few years ago:  I went to Amazon and began a wish list.  There isn’t much on it because I have very few wishes—at least ones that a human can do anything about.  And for most of our married life we have lived so closely that wishes for earthly things just made me discontent and unhappy so I avoided making them.  But every time I ordered something we needed from Amazon, there was that wish list icon in the top corner, so I gave in and made one.  I had to browse to come up with more than 2 things to put on it. I haven’t touched it since—and neither has anyone else.  In fact, I have completely forgotten what I put on it.  Must not have been too important, huh?
            I hear that some people have spiritual wish lists too.  Usually I find out when they come up to me and say, “I wish I had as much Bible knowledge as you do.”
            Let me set the record straight first.  I don’t have a passel of Bible knowledge in my hip pocket.  I have to look things up just like you do.  And, the knowledge I do have is courtesy of a husband whose knowledge is nearly encyclopedic and whose willingness to help is overflowing.  He is, in fact, the one who taught me how to study, so you could say that he is responsible for all of my so-called knowledge, both the answers he has given me and the things I have learned on my own.
            But about that knowledge you wish you had—why don’t you just do what I did and fulfill your own wish?  No one can do it for you anyway.  All it takes is time.  By that I mean hours at a time over a succession of years.  Do you really think I learned what I know in 2 weeks?  I have been working on this so long I have even had to unlearn a few things, because that’s the next step—growing in your knowledge as you hone your understanding of what you have learned.  It isn’t just a list of facts; it’s a compilation of concepts that weaves itself into a complex tapestry, and the more you learn the more clearly you will comprehend it.
            Don’t talk to me about “not having enough time.”  Nearly every one of us has changed our schedules to add something that was important to us.  You added children to your life.  That really changed your schedule.  You went back to school.  You started exercising.  You took on a new job.  When it mattered to you, you found the time.        
            I have learned this about wish lists—don’t put anything on them that you really need.  You may never get it when you are depending upon someone else.  Instead, buy yourself the present.  Buy this one—knowledge--with the same time and energy you spend on things that are not nearly as important. 
 
​Buy truth, and do not sell it; buy wisdom, instruction, and understanding. Prov 23:23
My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge…Hos 4:6.
 
Dene Ward

For probably the first ten years of my life we had a holiday ritual.  We spent every Christmas Eve with my daddy's parents and we had Christmas Dinner at my maternal grandmother's house with all her children, their spouses, and grandchildren.  Altogether there were about 20 of us in a small frame house, which might have been 800 square feet at most.  I still remember my grandmother's cornbread dressing which, despite her giving me her "recipe" of "this and that and a little more of the other if that looks like this," I have never been able to duplicate.  Like my mother I finally came up with my own and have stuck with it.  Then there was her banana pudding—vanilla wafers, very ripe bananas, a real egg custard, and meringue on top, usually still warm.
            The adults at this huge feast of a meal always sat in the dining room.  The babies still in high chairs sat next to the parents at the dining table.  The rest of us kids stood by as our mothers fixed us a plate and then set us up at "The Kids' Table," a small table in the kitchen.  Seems like we seldom talked much, and we certainly didn't play around much—both the table and the kitchen were too small for rambunctiousness if we wanted to stay out of trouble.  We usually sat there and listened to the grown-ups talking and laughing in the next room as we ate.  Sometimes we watched the backyard through the screen door right by the table, and always a cool December breeze blew in and chilled us and our food a little too quickly.  But a kitchen in Central Florida, even in December, needed an open door or a tiny house with twenty people in it would have been far too warm.  Some of the kids actually got up as soon as they could to go sit on the front porch and swing or play on the gray-painted planks, missing dessert entirely, but I have never skipped dessert in my life, if it was available.
            We moved away when I was nine and after a couple of years traveling the long road back from Tampa to Orlando, we began keeping our own holiday traditions and meal at our house.  Once in a while we returned for some special year, like the year Keith was introduced to the family.  By then, the kids' table had added the front porch as its adjunct for the teenagers.  Not many were still small enough for that tiny kitchen, and we could all fill our own plates.  We were responsible for what we ate, how much, and when.
            If you called the church a holiday celebration, who would be sitting in the dining room and who would be sitting at the Kids' Table?  Paul seemed to think the Corinthians might be in the kitchen or perhaps in the high chairs with the babies.  But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready (1Cor 3:1-2).  If you keep reading, their problems were jealousy, strife, and divisions which manifested themselves in a host of ways, as the remainder of the book shows. 
            But that isn't the only way we act like children.  …So that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes (Eph 4:14).  Once again if you read the surrounding verses you find issues with unity and love as well as their lack of a foundation in the Word, which is why those gifts were given—apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, and teachers to provide them that foundation.
            And of course, the classic passage:  For when by reason of the time ye ought to be teachers, you have need again that someone teach you the rudiments of the first principles of the oracles of God; and are become such as have need of milk, and not of solid food. For every one that partakes of milk is without experience of the word of righteousness; for he is a baby (Heb 5:12-13).
            If I wanted to make just one application from these passages and the metaphor I began with, it might be this:  The children had to have their plates dipped out by their mothers.  They not only couldn't reach across the big dining table, they did not know how to put a balanced meal on their plates.  I remember thinking that Nannie's dressing and banana pudding would make one fine meal, thank you very much, but for some reason I also ended up with green beans and collard greens, too.  How are we doing at dishing up our spiritual plates?  Do we only eat what the elders' choose to dish out in the Bible classes of our assembly, picking at it like it was collard greens, or do we study on our own, making the time to dig deeply into the Word as if it really meant something to us?  Do we ever attend the extra studies offered, or even go to a more-studied brother and ask to study with him?  Do we have to be force-fed the Bread of Life?
           We kids always felt a little resentment at being at the Kids' Table, waiting very impatiently until we were grown-up enough to move to the porch at least, if not the dining table.  How about us?  Are we ready to grow up and move on, or are we perfectly happy being spoon-fed?
 
But solid food is for fullgrown men, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern good and evil (Heb 5:14).
 
Dene Ward

I just took my 88 year old mother grocery shopping.  In the past two or three years, her eyesight has gone downhill considerably.  She has to be careful when she picks up an item to make sure it is the right variety, especially as a type 2 diabetic.  “No sugar added” or “sugar free” are important to her. 

My eyes aren’t much, if any better, than hers.  But having shopped for her several times recently when she was ill, I had a much easier time of it.  I have been dealing with bad eyesight since I was born.  When you cannot see well, you adapt.  I learned a lot of tricks a long time ago.  I cannot see faces across a room, but I recognize walks; I memorize clothing colors; I know voices and laughs.  So after the first time I shopped for my mother I knew that her variety of yogurt had a little blue circle on it.  I didn’t need to turn the box upside down looking for the necessary phrase, nor try to read the fine print.  I didn’t even need to know that the little blue circle said “60 calories.”  The reason the calorie count is so low is that there is “no sugar added.”  I learned that the first time, when I did have to pick up the box, hold it close to my nose and scour the surface.  I learned that her favored fruit cups have a blue banner on them.  No blue banner and it’s the wrong fruit cup.  I do a lot of things like that.
 
A long time ago we did not have color coded road signs.  But once they came out, I was home free.  I picked up on the colors immediately.  Forty years ago we were in a strange town visiting a friend at a hospital.  We did not know exactly where the hospital was, but it was a small town so we figured we could find it.  As we crossed every intersection I looked one way down the cross street and Keith looked the other.  “There!” I said.  “Turn here.”
            Keith turned and seeing no hospital said, “How do you know?”
            “Because there’s a square blue sign down there.”
            “So?” he said.
            “Hospital signs are blue squares with a big H on them.” 
And sure enough, as we got closer, there was an H on that sign and two blocks later the hospital appeared on our right.  I could not read the sign, but I could see a blue square. 

Before long Keith picked up on the color coding too.  When we camp, we always look for brown, the telltale color of a state park sign.

Do you know why I can do those things?  Because it’s necessary to my functioning independently.  As long as I want to do for myself, regardless my decreasing vision, I pick up on these things and use them.  My various eye drops have different colored tops.  The individual vials that look almost the same, feel different in my hands.  That is very important because each eye requires different medications.  I could cause a lot of damage if I mixed things up. 

I started teaching myself these things before I could even read.  When I was 4 and there were a lot fewer car models, I recognized them by their taillights.  It used to tickle my Daddy to death when four-year-old me identified cars to startled friends and neighbors.  I learned those tricks and devices then and I just keep on doing it.  It’s habit, and it’s habit because it’s important.

Now don’t tell me you can’t learn Bible facts because you are “too old” or you’re “not smart enough.”  That is not the problem.  The problem is that it’s not important enough to you.  Didn’t you have to take a driving test?  How about tests at work to earn promotions?  When it becomes a necessity in your mind, you can do just fine.  You may have to learn a few mnemonic devices, but you can do it.  I am not good with numbers any longer, but I always remember what side of the page a verse is on, and once I remember the book I can browse through and find it.  I make up silly songs and sing them (silently) in my head.  I remember alphabetic tricks. 

And finally there is this:  if you read something enough times and study it deeply enough, not just once but again and again and again, you will eventually know it just like you know your own name, address, phone number, cell number, social security number, PIN number, and the dozen passwords you have to know to function in this technological world.  And I bet you know the addresses and most of the phone numbers you had before the ones you have now.  Why?  Because you had to know them all at one point in your life.  4916 Bristol Court, 8011 Pine Hill Drive, 125 W Walnut Street, Route 4 Oak Drive, Route 2 Box 790-B, Route 3 Box 1559—all of those used to be my addresses, the first one before I even started elementary school.

Don’t tell me you can’t learn the Bible.  Don’t tell me that so-and-so’s Bible class is too deep.  Don’t tell me you can’t remember the 12 sons of Jacob, the judges, the kings, the apostles, and all the books of the Bible.  If you can’t, it’s because you don’t want to badly enough.  It isn’t necessary for you to function in this life.  And that’s where the problem lies.  God and His Word do not constitute your life and your reason for being.  If they did, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation.
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With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments! I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you…In the way of your testimonies I delight as much as in all riches. I will meditate on your precepts and fix my eyes on your ways. I will delight in your statutes; I will not forget your word. Ps 119:10-11,14-16
 
Dene Ward