Today's post is by guest writer, Lucas Ward.
 
2 Pet. 1:4  "whereby he hath granted unto us his precious and exceeding great promises; that through these ye may become partakers of the divine nature"
The promises of God to us are truly great.  They are the reason we follow after Him.  We want to avoid Hell and we want to be with Him in Heaven.  In Romans 8 we are told that we will be joint-heirs with Christ.  Paul teaches the Colossians that we will have the opportunity to partake of the inheritance of the saints in light (1:12).  These are vague statements, however.  Other than "streets of gold" most of us have a very cursory understanding of the promises we hope in.  We often spend more time learning about Hell.  So, why is Heaven so great, and why should I want to go there?

Heaven provides a rest.  Heb 4:9,11  "There remaineth therefore a sabbath rest for the people of God. . . Let us therefore give diligence to enter into that rest, that no man fall after the same example of disobedience."  Ok, so we get to rest, but what does that mean?  2 Thess. 1:7  "and to you that are afflicted rest with us, at the revelation of the Lord Jesus from heaven with the angels of his power in flaming fire"  So, part of the rest is a relief for those who are afflicted for their service to God.  So, all the snide comments, bullying, and out-and-out trouble we face for serving God will be at an end.  We also get rest from laboring for God:  "And I heard a voice from heaven saying, Write, Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from henceforth: yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labors; for their works follow with them."  Rev. 14:13.  We sing a song, "We'll Work til Jesus Comes", and that is the life a Christian should live--being useful to God and serving Him.  Once we've inherited and live with Him in Heaven, that strenuous effort will be over.  One final way we will have rest is a surcease of all the pain and sorrow this world so often brings us.  God promises to wipe all the tears from our eyes (Rev. 21:4) and that there will be no more weeping.  In every way important, Heaven will be a rest.

Heaven is that better country that Abraham was looking for (Heb. 11:16).  And, oh, is it better.  First, realize that it was planned for us by God.  Matt. 25:34  "Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world".  cf. John 14:2-3.  So, wait a minute.  You mean that the all-powerful Creator of the universe has been carefully planning and constructing  a paradise for me to live in?  Yes.  Do you think it might be nice?  Do you think that the One who created us might know what it takes to make us happy and content?  And He's had since the creation to work out all the kinks, so to speak. 

Another reason Heaven is a better country is because of who won't be there.  Eph. 5:5  "For this ye know of a surety, that no fornicator, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God."  Rev 22:14-15  "Blessed are they that wash their robes, that they may have the right to come to the tree of life, and may enter in by the gates into the city.  Without are the dogs, and the sorcerers, and the fornicators, and the murderers, and the idolaters, and every one that loveth and maketh a lie."  Notice, all the trouble makers, all those who add to the tribulations natural to this world are outside of Heaven.  No, we aren't wishing damnation on any, but knowing that the unrepentant, obnoxious sinner won't be with us for eternity is a blessing, and something to look forward to. 

In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul describes a vision of Paradise.  When you compare that to some of the descriptions in Revelation 21-22 we see that Heaven is described as a return to the Garden of Eden.   Rev. 21:3 speaks of God dwelling with men; the last time that literally happened was in Eden.    Rev. 22:1-5 speaks of a river of the Water of Life and not a single Tree of Life, but a whole grove of the Trees of Life.  Heaven will be like Eden, only better.  It is a place of joy (Ps. 16:11) and glory.  Col. 3:4  "When Christ, who is our life, shall be manifested, then shall ye also with him be manifested in glory."   2 Cor. 4:17  "For our light affliction, which is for the moment, worketh for us more and more exceedingly an eternal weight of glory". 

The description of the New Jerusalem in Rev. 21 adds even more to our understanding of the wonder of Heaven.  Two concepts stand out in the description of New Jerusalem.  The first is the extraordinary wealth of the city.  The twelve foundations of the city are each encrusted in different jewels.  Gigantic pearls are used as gates to the city.  (Can you imagine a pearl large enough to be hollowed out and used as a gate?!)  Gold used to paving and building material for the city at large.  This is wealth such as to dwarf dreams.  The point of this over-the-top description is to emphasize the security from want that the inhabitants would enjoy.  For a people who literally had to worry about their daily bread (Matt. 6:11), this security was peace beyond imagining. 

The second aspect of the city was its extreme safety.  If you convert the measurements given in Rev. 21:16-17, the walls of the city were 1,400 miles high and over 200 feet thick.  Marauding armies had no hope of penetrating these walls.  The city was completely secure.  Again, for a people used to periodic attacks from raiders and robbers, that security was a blessing beyond belief.  When Jesus said, in John 10:28, that no one would snatch His sheep out of His hand, He meant it. 

Finally, we are told that this inheritance we will receive is incorruptible (1 Pet. 1:4) and that we will enjoy eternal life with Him in this Paradise (Matt. 25:46, Jn 6:40).  The joy and glory we will know will never end, never fade away, and never seem stale. 

So, is Heaven worth a little sacrifice?
 
Lucas Ward

Today's post is by Keith Ward, part 2 of last month's topic.
 
Though it is clear that demons no longer inhabit and control people as they did in New Testament times, that does not mean that demons are no longer active.
 
I am often frustrated and sometimes get sinfully angry because things are "out to get me."  Many times, things have happened to ruin a project or a chore in such an unlikely way as to make winning the lottery a sure thing.  A few times, things have gone wrong in ways that clearly violated the laws of physics.  No.  Really!
 
Sounds like paranoia right? But, that does not mean it is not happening.  Consider Job.  Satan said to God, "Bet you I can make him sin." God replied, "No you can't; go to it." Now, we know the story of Job losing everything by natural (?) means in a series of events so improbable that we would hoot and throw popcorn if it were in a movie instead of the Bible.
 
Peter warns, "Be of sober spirit, be on the alert.  Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour" (1Pet 5:8).   Do we not realize that just like he did with Job, Satan is using natural means to destroy us? We hit all the lights green when we have time to spare, and red when we are running late.  The opportunity for pornography, or alcohol, or theft, or slander or….arises when it seems impossible for us to be caught.  Who do you think makes these things happen? That teaching that makes something we want to do seem so right entices us because "even Satan fashions himself into an angel of light.  It is no great thing therefore if his ministers also fashion themselves as ministers of righteousness, whose end shall be according to their works."  (2Cor 11:14-15). 
 
Demons, agents of Satan, are everywhere working to destroy our walk and turn our claim to be Christians into a mockery.  Sometimes things do "fall up." Sometimes we do believe something we want to be true in spite of unclear logic supporting it.  Whatever it takes, that evil one will do in hopes of destroying us.  Beware!
 
Physical ailments can be "messenger(s) of Satan to buffet" us (2Cor 12:7).
Our best and noblest plans can be hindered by Satan (1Thess 2:18).
Evil men arise to power in the world "according to the working of Satan" (2Thess 2:9).
 
It helps me to deal with my weaknesses to realize that things do not just "happen to happen." Satan is out to get me.  God so warned.  I am not a victim of circumstances.  I am the target of evil trying to destroy me.  My faith is challenged and rises up to defend my soul when I know I am in a warfare and deadly missiles are being aimed at me.  I hope this will help you do the same.
 
Finally, be strong in the Lord, and in the strength of his might.Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world-rulers of this darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places (Eph 6:10-12).
 
Keith Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Lucas Ward.

When he was first preaching to Cornelius, Peter made an interesting description of Jesus.  Acts 10:38  "Jesus of Nazereth . . . who went about doing good."  There are many other ways I would think of to describe Jesus to someone before I thought of that one.  Son of God.  Man of Sorrows.  King.  Loving Savior.  Yet, Peter's description is perfectly correct.  When you think of His life, Jesus went about doing good.  So, if I am a disciple of Christ -- and disciple means a trained one or one who has been taught to do what his master did -- then my life should be defined by going about doing good too, right?  So, the first question should be exactly how did Jesus do good?
 
He had compassion on the unfortunate. 
Matt. 14:14  "And he came forth, and saw a great multitude, and he had compassion on them, and healed their sick."   Of course Jesus worked miracles to confirm that His message was from God.  He was establishing Himself as the Messiah.  But if displays of power were the only end to His miracles, He could have done anything.  He chose to heal, because He had compassion.  People needed help and He had the ability to help, and so He did.  
He also showed compassion when He fed the hungry.  Mark 8:2-3  "I have compassion on the multitude, because they continue with me now three days, and have nothing to eat:  and if I send them away fasting to their home, they will faint on the way; and some of them are come from far."  This is the time He fed the five thousand and again, a chief motivation to use this sign was His compassion for those unable to help themselves.
Finally, He comforted the bereaved.  Luke 7:12-15  "Now when he drew near to the gate of the city, behold, there was carried out one that was dead, the only son of his mother, and she was a widow: and much people of the city was with her.   And when the Lord saw her, he had compassion on her, and said unto her, Weep not.  And he came nigh and touched the bier: and the bearers stood still. And he said, Young man, I say unto thee, Arise.  And he that was dead sat up, and began to speak. And he gave him to his mother."  This lady was already a widow and now her only child had died.  Beyond the grief normal to any mother, she now was without any means of support.  She was grieving both her son and her own imminent destitution.  Jesus had compassion on her.
 
Another way Jesus went about doing good is that He taught the good news.
Matt. 4:17  "From that time began Jesus to preach, and to say, Repent ye; for the kingdom of heaven is at hand."  The book of Matthew is mostly a collection of His sermons.  John, a treatise on His miracles, is still mostly comprised of sermons and personal discourses to His apostles.  During the time of His earthly ministry Jesus never stopped proclaiming the good news.  He proclaimed that the kingdom was coming.  He told parable after parable describing the kingdom.  He taught against the formulaic ritualism of the Pharisees and taught the disciples about being servants.  He never quit sharing God's good news.
 
Finally, Jesus sacrificed for others.  Rom. 5:8  "But God commendeth his own love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."  He gave up His own so that others might have what they needed.
 
As His disciples, we can and should be doing these things ourselves.
 
We can have compassion on those less fortunate. 
While we cannot miraculously heal the sick, we can tend to them.  One of the qualifications of a "widow indeed" in 1 Tim. 5:10 is that she "relieve the afflicted."  And, of course, all Christian can pray.  James 5:14-15  "Is any among you sick? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord:  and the prayer of faith shall save him that is sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, it shall be forgiven him."  While this mentions the elders specifically, we know from a few verses later that the prayers of the righteous all work to good. 
 
We can also work to relieve the unfortunate and feed the hungry.
Gal 2:9-10  "and when they perceived the grace that was given unto me, James and Cephas and John, they who were reputed to be pillars, gave to me and Barnabas the right hands of fellowship, that we should go unto the Gentiles, and they unto the circumcision; only they would that we should remember the poor; which very thing I was also zealous to do."  What did Peter et al urge Paul to do?  What did Paul say he was already zealous to do?  Help the poor. Act 11:28-30  "And there stood up one of them named Agabus, and signified by the Spirit that there should be a great famine over all the world: which came to pass in the days of Claudius.  And the disciples, every man according to his ability, determined to send relief unto the brethren that dwelt in Judaea:  which also they did, sending it to the elders by the hand of Barnabas and Saul."  These disciples heard of a need and immediately determined to help.  Seems like that was a major focus of first century Christianity.  Can we do that today?  Yes, I know, "If any will not work, neither let him eat.'  2 Thess. 3:10, but not all who are having trouble are unwilling to work, and could it possibly be that we are just looking for excuses not to help?  Many just need a hand and, while we can't miraculously feed 5,000 at once, we can help.  Remember, the first person raised from the dead in the book of Acts wasn't the Apostle James or the great speaker Stephen, but Dorcas who spent her life taking care of the unfortunate (Acts 9:38-41).   
 
Finally, we can comfort the bereaved. 
Rom. 12:15  "Rejoice with them that rejoice; weep with them that weep."  James 1:27  "Pure religion and undefiled before our God and Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world."  We can't raise anyone from the dead, but we can be with them, weep with them, sit with them.  We can see to their needs as they go through their grieving process and beyond if the death has left them without support.  We can't work miracles, but in every way that Jesus showed compassion, we can too.
 
And we can all teach the Gospel.  Not all are gifted with the abilities to be teachers, whether in a public way or in one-on-one settings.  Nor should all try (James 3:1).  But every Christian can live his/her life in such a way that his light shines for all the world to see (Matt. 5:14-16).  We can all be ready to explain the reason for the hope we in Christ (1 Pet. 3:15).  This doesn't need to be erudite exposition, just a simple reason why we have hope.  If a Christian who doesn't teach then interests his friend or neighbor he can call on one of the teachers to help follow up.  But all can proclaim the Gospel in our lives.
 
We can also sacrifice for others.  1 Cor. 8:13  "Wherefore, if meat causeth my brother to stumble, I will eat no flesh for evermore, that I cause not my brother to stumble."  The eating of meat isn't a problem in modern churches, but anything I'm doing that could harm a brother -- even if I have a right to do it -- should be sacrificed for our love for each other.  1 Cor. 6:7  "Nay, already it is altogether a defect in you, that ye have lawsuits one with another. Why not rather take wrong? why not rather be defrauded?"  It is better to accept wrong than cause trouble in the church.  We can, and should, sacrifice our desires for our brethren.
 
Our Lord went about doing good.  Can we do any less?
 
Lucas Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Keith Ward.

As Jesus came down from the mount of transfiguration, he met a man whose son was demon possessed.  The nine apostles had not been able to cast out the demon and Jesus rebuked them for their lack of faith.  After he had cast out the demon, the nine disciples asked Jesus why they had not been able to do so.  Jesus replied, "This kind cannot be driven out by anything but prayer.” (Mark 9:29).  [Peter, James, and John were on the mount with Jesus and had not failed, or even tried.]
 
Despite the popularity of this movie genre, demons do not possess people today just as they did not do so in the Old Testament.  Demons operated for a short time to show the power of Jesus to control them.  The only Old Testament  passage to use the expression "unclean spirit" which is found so often in the gospels states that they will end in "the day" a fountain is opened for sin (Zech 13:1-2).  In fact, neither demons or unclean spirits are mentioned in any of the epistles as possessing people as they do in the gospels and Acts.
 
Nevertheless, I believe that we are possessed.  Not by spirit beings but by decades of sinful habits or by years of thinking evil thoughts so that our minds are grooved into following those paths.  Often, when we decide to turn over that new leaf, we find that we cannot cast out these "demons." Just like the nine apostles, we have expected it to be easy.  We sowed the wind and find we have a tornado in our soul that we cannot control (Hos 8:7).  Neither baptism nor genuine intent to change is a quick fix for cleansing our souls of these sins.  This kind comes out only by prayer.
 
But, a quick prayer when we are already halfway into the situation will not suffice.  It did not for the nine and these quick patches on a bleeding wound of the soul will not work for us.  And, somehow, I suspect God becomes weary of prayers for forgiveness when there were few or no prayers for strength before we sinned.
 
Our regret for this habitual sin should bring us to the knees of our heart continually throughout the day begging for strength from the Lord.  This earnest care to be pure will have us making time for studied lengthy prayers about our specific sin.  Our indignation that Satan still seeks to use the same old weakness against us again must motivate us to learn scriptures to enrich and strengthen our prayers.  The fear of God's wrath should have us examining the situations that lead us to fall and praying with zeal to prepare for them.  Our longing to be pure before a holy God will lead us to make the time for these prayers, no excuses, no exceptions.
 
Actual unclean spirit demons may not inhabit humans anymore, but the demons we have created by our careless certainty that God will keep on forgiving can be as hard to cast out.  Unless we do, we will not see God.
 
Set your hope perfectly … as children of obedience, not fashioning yourselves according to your former lusts in the time of your ignorance: but like as he who called you is holy, be ye yourselves also holy in all manner of living; because it is written, Ye shall be holy; for I am holy.  And if ye call on him as Father, who without respect of persons judges according to each man's work, pass the time of your sojourning in fear.  (1Pet 1:13-17)
 
Keith Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Lucas Ward.

What is the job of a song leader?  I think a lot of us would say that he is the guy who stands up front and starts each song.  That's true enough, and it leads to the idea of starting us off on the proper pitch, keeping the congregation singing at an appropriate pace for the song and maybe even utilizing musicality to enhance the impact of the song.  All of that is true, but it doesn't encompass the entirety of the job of a song leader. 

What is the purpose of singing?  Again, many would answer, "To praise God!"  That is certainly one purpose of singing.  Moses and Miriam each separately led the Israelites in song praising God for their salvation through the Red Sea.  David danced and sang before the Lord.  Certain Levites were assigned to sing in the Temple, praising God.  In John's Revelation we see that in Heaven the saved sing praises to God.  Certainly praising God is a reason to sing; worshipping Him in song has a long history.  While acknowledging this, what does the New Testament teach us about the purpose of singing? 

Eph 5:18-20  And be not drunken with wine, wherein is riot, but be filled with the Spirit;  speaking one to another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord;  giving thanks always for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; 

Col 3:16  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; in all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts unto God. 
 
We are to be speaking to one another with these songs.  The Word dwells in us when we teach and admonish through song.  Our song service is not just a time to praise/worship, but is also a time to teach, edify, and encourage each other. 
 
Understanding that our singing is meant to be a teaching tool what, then, is the job of a song leader?  He should be choosing songs that teach, edify, and encourage (and maybe even rebuke), as well as songs that praise God.  With very little effort, he can choose songs that all follow a single theme, and thereby reinforce the teaching that is being done in song.  All modern songbooks of which I am aware have topical indexes in the back which group the songs by theme.  Therefore, it takes little time or effort to choose a list of songs for a service all of which follow a theme:  the Christian life, or assurance of hope, or our love for God, or His for us, or exhortation to be about His work, or any number of other themes.
 
For example, one might begin a "traditional service" (you know, two songs, a prayer, a song, the LS, a song, the sermon and an invitation song) with "I Want to be a Worker for the Lord" and then sing "O the Things We May Do" before the prayer.  Any Lord's Supper song you like would follow that and then maybe "We'll Work til Jesus Comes" before the sermon and maybe even "Room in God's Kingdom" as an invitation song.  If you're thinking, "wow, that's a little on the nose", then I'd sadly say that you must be unaware of how little attention the average pew-filler pays to what he/she is singing.  It takes being that obvious for the message to seep in and the person to think, "hey, these songs follow a theme!"  I can't tell you how many times I've done this and then asked someone afterward if they had noticed, only to get a dull look and a negative response.  Once, ONCE!!!!! someone said to me, "your songs always seem to follow a theme."  Yes!  I wanted to dance a jig right there in the building!
 
Even if a majority never notice, a strong minority will, and will appreciate the effort the song leader has made to enhance the service by choosing songs that actually teach and that reinforce the teaching through following a theme. 
 
With a bit more effort, the song leader can set out themes that don't just follow the topical index.  When teaching the Psalms on Wednesday night several years ago I noticed that one psalm praised God simply by listing His attributes.  The next Sunday we sang "Great is Thy Faithfulness", "Grace Greater than All Our Sins", "He Loves Me So", and "Holy, Holy, Holy". 
 
Recently on a Sunday evening I led "The Rock that is Higher than I", "Dare to Stand Like Joshua", "This World is not My Home", and "On Jordan's Stormy Banks".  On the surface, that may not sound like a themed song service, but "The Rock that is Higher than I" is about the difficulties of this life and our reliance upon the Lord to get through it, then "Dare to Stand Like Joshua" is about making the decision to follow God no matter how hard it is.  That being followed by "This World is not My Home" shows the maturity of a Christian who is no longer tied to this world and is waiting anxiously for the reward while "On Jordan's Stormy Banks" is a declaration of the reward being sure.   Picking a list like that still isn't hard, but it does take a few moments of thought, and an understanding of what each song is about and what it teaches.  While the average Christian may not catch the fulness of the theme in a service like that, he/she is singing through it and some of those ideas will stick.  Oh! and notice that how fun the song is to sing or how musically challenging it is has NOTHING to do with a leader choosing songs which help his congregation in "teaching and admonishing one another". What matters is the message, the words we sing, not the catchy tunes.
 
Often, when I'm preparing to lead I'll have a song I want to sing and I'll just pick other songs that fit the ideas expressed in the first song.  If I know the preacher has been doing a series of lessons, I might pick songs that fit his topic.  Other times I'll pick songs that fit with some idea I've been mulling over, praying and studying about.  It rarely takes me more than 5-10 minutes to get a service ready (after all, I'm not writing the songs) but that is time well spent in leading the people to let the word dwell in them richly.
 
Not every song service needs to be thematic.  There are certainly times for great songs which mean a lot and cross into several areas of Christian life.  Every song should be carefully selected for what it is teaching, however, and what its impact will be on our brothers and sisters. 
 
A song leader's job is more important than most Christians think.  We spend almost as much time leading the congregation in teaching and admonishing as the preacher does is "reproving, rebuking, and exhorting".  While the average Christian may have trouble remembering what the sermon was about on Thursday, that same Christian may still be humming one of the songs we sang.  Song leaders need to take responsibility and be aware that we are to do more than just start the song on the right note. 
 
Lucas Ward
 

Today's post is by guest writer Warren Berkley.

While the New Testament says that a local church can die (Rev. 3:1), we should not be rash in expressing that judgment. First, we do not enjoy the insight and authority of the One who gave the verdict against Sardis. Further, there are some things easy to overlook in our haste.

1. Before you get too far into evaluating a group, be certain you evaluate yourself (Matt. 7:1-6). The Lord hasn’t called us to walk into churches and pronounce them dead. He has called us to evaluate ourselves by the highest standard, be patient, avoid grumbling and pitch in and help. Judgment from a distance and without self-examination is often flawed.
2. Most of the spiritual life of a local church will not be visible when the church is assembled. There are members helping needy members privately; preachers and elders encouraging and studying with members and other events private in nature (Matt. 6:1-18). There are members living righteously against the struggles of life, praying, talking to people about the Lord and raising their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Much of this may not be announced, publicized or obvious between 9:30 and noon Sunday morning.
3. Scriptural leadership is critical to the life of a local church. But there are cases where some resist good oversight. An entire congregation and/or the elders should not be adversely judged by the misconduct of some.
4. The consistent preaching and teaching of the Word of God is essential. If the Word is being presented (even if not in a style or venue you prefer), you should be capable of taking the Word and the lessons from it out of the building and into your life.
5. The care of the members for each other is a sign of life. This care must run far deeper and practical than just the shaking of hands and the smiling of faces. Your judgment about the “emotional tenor” of the group is personal, preferential and subjective. Quick criticism based on “what I want” can express more about me than the group.
6. The life of a local church must never be dismissed based on money, numbers or building. While it is true that faithful members will give to best of their ability, seek to convert people and make the best provision they can for assembling, these three things are not the primary signs of spiritual life. {Many churches pass the test of money, numbers and physical building – but fail to meet the test of submission to Christ.}
7. The key to the life of any local church is, honoring Christ. Poor people and old people can honor Christ can’t they? They may not seem to be lively to the eyes of some. God knows.

 
Warren Berkley

Warren is a gospel preacher, author, and the writer of berksblog.net.  He is also a fellow writer for the emag Pressing On.

Today's post is by guest writer Keith Ward.

Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.”
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh (Gen 2:23-24).

The stated reason that a man is to leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife is that she is bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh.  Such closeness does not come with the pronouncement of vows or a simple change of address.  Paul says a man never hates his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it as Christ does the church.  We are members of Christ's body, bone of his bones, and nourished and cherished by him.  What limits did Christ put on caring for his body, the church?  What need of his bride goes unmet?  Being head requires the love that motivates a husband to do all, not "all he can" but "all" to provide his wife's needs.

Christ's purpose toward his bride was to present the church to himself "not having spot or wrinkle" and becoming "holy and without blemish."  A husband's considered goal must be to nourish his bride into becoming that kind of wife.  The church requires liberal applications of washing with the word to become a present to Christ.  Most brides need nourishing and cherishing to transform them into the wife that is a glorious present to her husband.  Young husbands are not even being taught that they ought to be doing this much less, how to do it.  And, for the most part, the older men have focused only on being providers of the physical necessities and so, have zero experience in this area to pass on about the true meaning of nourishing and cherishing a woman.  [Clue, it takes more than candy on Valentine's Day and roses on your anniversary.]

If a house and a sufficient food supply feeds and warms the outward person, then what feeds a woman's character, her soul?  A man belonging to God must think about this in order to be the head God appointed him to be.  Providing physical needs is the easiest part, even during hard times.  What does your woman need in order to develop mentally, for her character to grow?  Maybe she has been protected and needs to learn to live in the real world; maybe her biblical knowledge is less than it ought to be; maybe she is still too much a child to be raising children.  Add to this, what are the husband's goals.  What if, for example, he hopes to be an elder?  Then what must she become to stand beside him?  

We quickly conclude that every man must develop a plan for them to grow together, to become one.  And, here I must confess that I failed.  We did not have a plan.  We just stumbled along with a Godward attitude and bounced around with a lot of bruises and somehow got better.  OH…. but how much better could we have become had someone shown me the need to develop a concrete plan for our one-ness to grow—bone of my bone, heart of my heart?  It could have been so much more, so much sooner.  Here are a couple of suggestions.

First, plans have to be flexible.  When you marry, you do not know so very much about each other after all.  Then, she will change: bride to wife, mother, empty nester, grandmother; children's teacher to women's Bible Class teacher, teacher's wife, deacon's wife, elder's wife.  Planning for each stage will be different and require Bible study together and practical discussions.

Next, plans must be realistic about her shortcomings and yours, and how you will work toward fixing these problems.  Books and preachers and elders can help, but the husband needs true wisdom to translate that information to meet their personal needs.  This is his duty as head.

Every woman needs emotional warming.  When she is upset about something, just hold her.  Don't formulate a solution, just hold her.  Listen.  Don't tell her how to fix it; [she knows] just listen.  And, then, hold her.  

She needs emotional feeding.  Compliment her.  Tell others how happy you are that she____________.   Encourage her.  Reward her.  There are things she needs that you will never understand.  Your job does not require understanding why, just understanding that she needs these things and giving them to her.
Whoso finds a wife finds a good thing.  But, not all married women are wives as defined in this proverb.  Good wives are born of nourishing and cherishing by good husbands who are determined to fulfill their role as Christ did for the church.

Servants, be submissive to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and gentle, but also to those who are unreasonable. (1Pet 2:18).
 
In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, (1Pet 3:1).

You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. (1Pet 3:7).

Keith Ward
 

Today's post is by guest writer Lucas Ward.

It’s common knowledge that the Old Testament worship rituals were a figure for our worship to God now. We mine the Passover for more insight into the Lord’s Supper, since Jesus is called our Passover (1 Cor. 5:7), but we also look into the Day of Atonement since we know He died to cleanse us of our sins (e.g. Rom. 5:6). Many of the lesser rituals also teach us a lot about what God expects from us in worship.

When we think of O.T. worship, we normally think of the sacrifice. And we think of it in terms of sacrificing something to God. The shepherd gives up a sheep he otherwise could have harvested wool from year after year and which could have been breeding stock as well. He sacrifices that sheep to God to show his devotion. The other way we think of sacrifices is in terms of something dying in our stead. When people living under the Law of Moses sinned, they had to offer a sin offering for forgiveness. Something had to die for them to be able to stand before God, a sacrifice had to be made.

There is another kind of sacrifice that was made, however. This one was the offering. Some of these offerings were barely different from a sacrifice of devotion, e.g. the burnt offering, but sometimes the concept of offering was very different. Sometimes a worshipper was just very happy because of his blessings and wanted to offer thanks to God. He would offer thanksgiving offerings (Lev. 7:11ff). Free will offerings were similar. One just wanted to worship God at a random time in the year, not part of one of the set feasts, and he brought an offering to God (Lev. 23:21ff). The concept here was less of making a sacrifice for God and more of giving Him a gift. In fact, the free-will offering was very much like a barbeque in which God was the guest of honor.

Even in these free-will offerings and thanksgiving offerings there were rules and procedures which had to be followed. Chief among these was the necessity of the offering being unblemished:

Lev. 22:21-22 “And when anyone offers a sacrifice of peace offerings to the LORD to fulfill a vow or as a freewill offering from the herd or from the flock, to be accepted it must be perfect; there shall be no blemish in it. Animals blind or disabled or mutilated or having a discharge or an itch or scabs you shall not offer to the LORD or give them to the LORD as a food offering on the altar.”

When giving a gift to God, the Israelites were told to give their best. They weren’t to give God second-rate offerings. After all, the purpose was to offer up “a sweet savor to the Lord”. That sweet savor, or pleasing aroma, wouldn’t come from halt, maimed, or scabby sheep. God deserved the best.

We can learn from this as we offer our worship to the Lord. After all, we ourselves are to be a sweet savor to the Lord. 2 Cor. 2:15 “For we are a sweet savor of Christ unto God”. First, and obviously, the offering of our lives to the Lord must be of our own free-will. We must choose to devote our lives to Him. No one else can make this choice for us, nor should anyone be able to stop us from making this commitment.

To the concept that our lives are to bring a pleasing aroma before God add in Rom. 14:8 “For whether we live, we live unto the Lord; or whether we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we are the Lord's.” Also Col. 3:23 “whatsoever ye do, work heartily, as unto the Lord, and not unto men”. Now our lives are offerings to God. Am I living in such a way that God only gets the best? After all, Jesus said that the greatest commandment is “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with ALL thy heart, and with ALL thy soul, and with ALL thy mind.” (Matt. 22:37)

While this concept of offering the best to God should be carried to every aspect of our lives, let’s just look at the worship services we participate in on a weekly basis. When we sing, do we sing to the Lord? 1 Cor. 14:15b “I will sing with the spirit, and I will sing with the understanding also.” So, do I pay attention to the words? Do I think about them, ponder what they mean? Or do I get caught up in the soaring melodies and intricate harmonies? Am I so busy looking for new sounds that I forget to contemplate the old lessons being taught? The Greek word translated “one another” in Eph. 5:19 and Col. 3:16 is most often translated “to ourselves”. While songs are a great way to edify the whole congregation, the first one I can be teaching with these songs is myself, but only if I bother to pay attention and think about them. When I offer God worship in song, am I offering my best?

What about during the prayers? Am I paying attention? Am I considering what is being prayed so I can offer an “Amen” at the end? 1 Cor. 14:6 says that the members of the congregation need to be able to understand the prayers so they can say “Amen”. Doesn’t it also follow that they need to listen with understanding to be able to so join in? When the church offers up a prayer to God as part of our worship, am I participating, or am I thinking about what I’m going to have for lunch and whether or not the Steelers will cover the spread? Am I offering my best?

The sermon cuts both ways, as does the Bible class. In the audience, am I listening and considering what is being taught? Am I being noble, searching the scriptures like the Bereans? (Acts 17). Am I using the opportunity to hear God’s word as a chance to offer up worship to Him? Or am I dozing off?

But as the preacher or teacher, am I using the opportunity to present a lesson on His word as a chance to offer up a gift to Him? Am I prepared, organized, researched and ready? Or am I winging it because I couldn’t be bothered to take the time to prepare properly? I know that personally there have been too many times when I wasn’t as prepared to teach as I should have been. Those lessons often went very well, but I know that I wasn’t offering an unblemished gift to God those nights.

When we come together to offer up our worship to God, we need to give our best. And it doesn’t matter how old or young we are. If someone is old enough to count the cost (Luke 14) and make a commitment to God, then s/he is old enough to sing along with understanding, pay attention during prayers and sermons, and offer true worship to God during our services. If they aren’t old enough to pay attention, how could they have truly counted the cost?

Lev. 22:29 “And when you sacrifice a sacrifice of thanksgiving to the LORD, you shall sacrifice it so that you may be accepted.”

Lucas Ward

A continuing series by guest writer Keith Ward.

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (Gen 2:24). 

Though we often use the word, "cleave," in our wedding ceremonies, elsewhere in our times it is mainly used of a meat cleaver that cuts things apart.  Certainly not what God intended by Moses' inspired comment!  The Hebrew word means to cling but few translations use that and also have the true meaning of "one flesh."  The word for cleave also means "adhere," in our vernacular, "stick like glue" or to "cling like Velcro."  Obviously God intends that the husband hold the woman fast to him in a special way that is unique, different from any other relationship.

Unquestionably, God intends "one flesh" to be a full-time occupation and it is the man's primary responsibility.   "What God joined together" stays together though geography separates the couple by hundreds of miles.  The importance of developing this relationship is emphasized by the use of the same word in the same way in the Shema, "Hear, O Israel: Jehovah our God is one Jehovah" (Deut 6:4).  Though we understand that God is three persons, He is ONE.  In the same way, the husband is to leave all else to make himself one with his wife.  Perhaps God intended this relationship as it approaches its ideal to teach us about Him.  If so, treating it casually reflects our disdain for God.
 
Becoming one first requires leaving. Moses refers to "father and mother" as the ultimate that a man must put behind him. They were the first people he knew and the first and primary relationship in his life. Again, geography has little to do with leaving and especially in that society where generations of extended family lived together. Jacob was probably not the first "Mama's boy" and he certainly has not been the last. Not only must he leave, the husband must act so decisively that his wife is confident of her primacy. "The way Mama did it" and large amounts of time spent with his family with or without the wife indicate a failure to leave. He must never allow his parents to criticize his wife even if that requires strong measures. I often tell Dene that she is my "only."  My actions prove that is not just "sweet nothings."
 
Parents are not the only obstruction to leaving and cleaving. Many men I have worked with spent more time hunting and fishing with their buddies than they spent with their wives. Hobbies can be wonderful and useful to a man's character, but when they regularly occupy more time than she does, the wife is justified in feeling that she is nothing more than a cook and a sex object to him. Couples who both work outside the home and for whom household chores occupy much of their time together must make special effort to keep their relationship strong. The fact is that they both spend more time with and have more conversation with co-workers than they do with one another. Children become another separator. If care is not taken, time will pass and no glue will remain to adhere them to one another; occasional sex will become the only sense of "one flesh" that remains.
 
Oneness must be nurtured with care—make mutual decisions about everything: where to live, whether to take a promotion, where to worship, the standards and rules to apply to raising children, whether she works outside the home and the division of labor for the housework. What others think does not matter. Otherwise, you neither left nor are you cleaving. A husband demonstrates commitment to his wife by never even thinking about flirting with another woman and the wife should see this and have this confidence. He must never criticize her to others, and care must be taken to not fight in front of the children. Not only must he not criticize, he must not allow others to criticize her in his presence. I should not have to say that women never appreciate male humor and she is well aware that "many a truth is spoken in jest. Don't. Just Don't.
 
Timothy was likely in his forties when Paul admonished, "flee youthful passions" (2Tim2:22). If he was not speaking of "midlife crises" than application certainly exists. Men begin to realize their dreams conceived in youthful idealism will never happen and they go wild in pursuit of youthful fancies. Observation leads me to believe that well over half of all Corvettes are owned by men over 40 which is also true for Harley motorcycles. "Arm candy" for gray headed men has spawned a major industry in Viagra and Cialis. Leaving and cleaving and one flesh are left in Satan's dust as husbands think of little but Self.
 
Many married couples have lived together for years in various residences and are no more married than the shacked-up couple who sees no need for a legal piece of paper to validate their relationship. The unmarried couple has a point, a piece of paper does not make a couple married in the sense God intends—He must leave and cleave, she must submit, he must dwell with her according to knowledge, he must love her as Christ loved the church, he is to lead and he is to nourish and cherish her. Notice how heavily these foundations of marriage are weighted toward the husband—this is the responsibility of being head. "Head" is not a right. If theirs is not a marriage that emulates the relationship among the Godhood, then the failure is his.
 
Servants, be submissive to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and gentle, but also to those who are unreasonable. (1Pet 2:18).

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, (1Pet 3:1).

You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. (1Pet 3:7).
 
Keith Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Mark Roberts.
 
The Internet and all that goes with it used to live on a desktop or laptop computer. Now we carry it in the palm of our hands with a smart phone or tablet. Apps and browsers connect us to the entire world at the speed of light. Yet more and more people are beginning to think and re-think about how they are affected by the digital devices we carry (and love). Of course, the Bible doesn’t have an explicit “Thou shalt not have aniPhone” passage. Does that mean we get one and use it without thought? What is needed in situations where there is not a clear “thus saith the Lord” but we may have some reservations and concerns is wisdom. How can I get the good from digital devices without them causing me more problems than they are worth? That is a question seeking wisdom. Let’s go get some from the Bible’s books of wisdom, Proverbs and Ecclesiastes!

First, recognize part of our problem is that we are not intentional with our devices. Someone says “Have you got this app?” and we load it. “Are you on this social network?  Everyone is, it’s so cool!” and we join it. But everything we add to our phone (and use) puts additional pressure and time loads on our lives. If I’m not on Instagram and then I join where will the time come from that I surf and look at Instagram? I don’t get more minutes added to my day when I add an app. So where will the time to use that app come from? Did I intentionally choose “I will do less of this because I want to do this new app?” No. I just download it in on my device and end up with a life that is cramped
and compressed.  When I add an app, particularly a social media app, I need to ask “What will I give up to make room for this? What will be crowded out by doing this new thing?” More often than not, it could be my spiritual disciplines that suffer. That’s why I need to be intentional! “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven” (Eccl3:1).

Secondly, part of the trouble with social media and the Internet is that it feeds the arrogance of “I matter.” A lot of social media is about me. It’s me showing my great vacation. It’s me talking about me and my life. And more and more, it seems, it’s me sharing my opinion on everything. This news story. This action by a celebrity. This political contest. Apparently the world is waiting to hear what I think about all this and more and I need to weigh in! I will set people straight - just wait till they read my Facebook post on today’s hot topic! Wait till they see the meme I post ridiculing those I disagree with!
 
This is madness. This is pride gone to seed and bearing a bitter harvest. Making something about me is not wise. Talking more about me isn’t interesting to anybody else and it’s not good for me. As for thinking that my opinion matters on the recent scandal or news story ... that’s just as foolish. How do we imagine that we know enough to comment because we saw something on the Internet? Do we think we really have all the facts? Do we really know the background and context of complicated situations and circumstances? Could we be led astray by fake news? Without any regard for these cautions I can dive right in and tell the world what is what, as if I really know (how arrogant) or that anyone cares what I think anyway (again, just arrogance). “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom” (Proverbs 11:2).

Thirdly, we need to realize that anything that is instant often isn’t wise. The Internet is immediate, isn’t it? I can share my thoughts, my photos, my opinions, my ideas now.  So when I’m angry I can just vent on the spot. When I’m upset I can tell the world how unhappy I am. When I am sure I know the problem (and its solution) I can spout my counsel to everyone. All of this can be done without much thought, much consideration, or much time spent carefully considering if what I’m saying needs to be said, is helpful, kind or loving. I just type it out and press SEND or POST. Bang. Instantly I’ve put itout there. There’s not much wisdom in that, is there?  “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18).

I don’t believe we have to smash our phones (or go back to old fashioned flip phones with no internet access). However, I do believe we should bring wisdom to every part of our lives, and that does include the device in your pocket! Be wise in your use of technology!

“When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.” (Proverbs 10:19)

Mark Roberts
 
Mark Roberts is the editor of Pressing On, a monthly e-magazine. He and his wife Dena have worked with the Westside church in Irving, Texas, for more than twenty-five years. Pressing On, for which I also write, can be had delivered straight to your computer for only $10.00 a year.  If you are interested, please contact me on the contact page on the left sidebar and I will connect you with Mark.  Dene Ward